I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
