Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
