i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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