Only a mothe r could love this liver
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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