U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
and you fell through a lawn chair
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize
