Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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