i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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