We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize