Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
