I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Randomize
