Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Boobs are out for the taking
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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