party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
