Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah