i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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