Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Randomize
