As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
