But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i think my mom watched the whole time
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
