Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
