I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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