Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
