When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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