So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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