There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Randomize
