need another drink. this is the easiest way
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
