he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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