Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
