ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize