If that was your dad, he is hot
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
