I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling