God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
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Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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