im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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