winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
