is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
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I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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