This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
