The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
