Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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