She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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