Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
