ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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