Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I AM VODKA MAN
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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