Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Randomize
