so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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