is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
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