I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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