There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
