If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Less talking, more tequila
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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