Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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