Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
