Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Bring me that man meat
Idk if I want to put a bra on
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
