I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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