Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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